No reason to post this poem. And lesser reason to say goodbye to people I loved at one point. Worlds changed, times flew and I was no stronger. Time and again I remind myself to anchor myself, be strong and centred… Time and again, my flexibility and strength are challenged. To all of you, who still remember me as the warm, straight-haired girl who spoke too damn fast, I would so like to have all of you back. But I am just a dumb witness at this point. Watching situations unravel themselves and hoping that one day life will be as beautiful as it was. Well, this is the most important moment of all since this moment is all that’s true. Everything else, past and future, is either memory or imagination. The truth lies in the present moment. And so on things will proceed to their natural end. No roads will lie unused, no leaves will stay unswept… and I will move on with a smile playing around my lips and lightness in my heart. C’est la vie.
No Road
Since we agreed to let the road between us
Fall to disuse,
And bricked our gates up, planted trees to screen us,
And turned all time’s eroding agents loose,
Silence, and space, and strangers – our neglect
Has not had much effect.
Leaves drift unswept, perhaps; grass creeps unmown;
No other change.
So clear it stands, so little overgrown,
Walking that way tonight would not seem strange,
And still would be followed. A little longer,
And time would be the stronger,
Drafting a world where no such road will run
From you to me;
To watch that world come up like a cold sun,
Rewarding others, is my liberty.
Not to prevent it is my will’s fulfillment.
Willing it, my ailment.
— Philip Larkin
P.S. I read ‘No Road’ a few years back and till date, it remains one of my favourite pieces. There is so much of loneliness in the poem and yet it has elements of passion, strength. If you have ever bid adieu to a dear pal and moved away with the dullest ache in your heart, you know what the poem says. The tilt requires a 180-degree shift and inspite of the number of years that pass, you always know that the reverse spin is infinitely simpler. Yet you lack the confidence to make that spin on your heels. You think that Time or Destiny or Fate ordained that the present state of affairs be what they are. And you can’t get rid of that nagging ‘What if’ which keeps bugging you all the time.
sthira says:
And yet sometimes it just takes one phone call, one letter, one email, one warm Hello or a smile to go down memory lane again and continue from where the road diverged and from where people went their own separate ways. Lekin shayad pehle wo pehle wo mein zindagi hee beet jaati hai and the Ifs and Buts remain!
November 30, 2004 — 5:10 pm
nirmalrk says:
je conviens
November 30, 2004 — 6:22 pm
Lakshmi says:
I am sorry I have limited idea what conviens means…
November 30, 2004 — 8:18 pm
nirmalrk says:
agree
November 30, 2004 — 11:03 pm
Lakshmi says:
A bit late to comment but that’s a funny userpic…:-)
Been a while since I saw such *calm* headbanging…:-)
December 6, 2004 — 11:11 am
radhika74 says:
“Well, this is the most important moment of all since this moment is all that’s true.”
if only we all realised that ..:)
December 1, 2004 — 12:42 am
fugney says:
Hmmm… I didn’t really follow that after the first stanza. But I’ve been through this…. it’s hard.
December 1, 2004 — 1:39 am
99kanitas says:
Leaves drift unswept, perhaps; grass creeps unmown;
i know that feeling.. π
π spin states
What if
~ ‘it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’
December 1, 2004 — 6:30 pm
vasanth says:
Hi
connecting from Bahrain.As you know now.
December 1, 2004 — 8:14 pm
trycatchdenz says:
C’est la vie
–Indeed–
Spoke fast and you… Tell me that… π
Cheerz,
Denz
December 3, 2004 — 3:49 pm
Lakshmi says:
Did you think so too?
:-))
December 6, 2004 — 4:49 am
trycatchdenz says:
Have vague memories of it.
Cheerz,
Denz
December 8, 2004 — 3:13 pm
hollowandempty says:
that’s such a beautiful thing u wrote…so honest and sincere. Write what u know gurrrl! yeah, i know, i always comment on your writing but not always about what you say….but i understand what you say, especially this thing….and it’s funny that you should post this poem, because i ended a deep relationship recently…and that poem you posted mirrors what i would have like to write myself, but just couldn’t find the goddamn words…i hate words…
“words are killers you know.
words are my obsession and my torment.
When i die one day, i will only blame words”
-Stephanie Lakshmi Onofri
…i think it’s because they fail me sometimes…
December 6, 2004 — 10:58 am
Lakshmi says:
Bang on target!
At the risk of sounding dramatic, I have to say that I have this weird love-hate relationship with words. I try SO damn hard to have a good *working* relationship with them but they’re so damn fickle! Some times, they support my sentiment ably and some other times, they stand on the sidelines and laugh as I sweat it out…:-)
December 6, 2004 — 11:13 am