My heart feels like lead. The weekend was absolutely fabulous and now Guruji is gone. Gone to Germany and it’ll be months before I see Him again. We had such a golden opportunity to see Him off at the airport and even that was blown. Now it’s a cold, misty morning in Atlanta and the tears just can’t stop flowing. It truly feels like ‘Ab kuch nahin raha…’.
Update
Hey all, thanks for your concern but I am fine now. Punched in my password this morning on my laptop at work, promptly burst into tears, blew my nose and sniffled into my large, blue handkerchief and was quite fine after that. Now we’re already planning our next trip to meet Him…:-)
warmpinkglow says:
I totally understand how that feels.
May 8, 2006 — 7:01 am
Lakshmi says:
🙂 Feeling a lot better now and am already planning the next visit to meet Him!
May 8, 2006 — 9:56 am
fugney says:
Aren’t his opinions supposed to matter more?
May 8, 2006 — 9:33 am
Lakshmi says:
Matter more than what?
May 8, 2006 — 9:57 am
fugney says:
His presence.
May 8, 2006 — 9:57 am
gleefulfreak says:
I dunno. While I don’t have the same Guru as Locks, i think it’s a very common experience that the presence of the Guru is incomparable and fills the heart with longing. Yes, the teaching is important, and sustains us, but it’s the attachment to the Guru in the first place that allows us to absorb those teachings. Being heartbroken when they leave is just part of the love.
Just my (Westerner) take on it.
May 8, 2006 — 12:15 pm
Lakshmi says:
While it is true that the body is just one of His dimensions, the fact is that the heart yearns for the physical presence. Of course, we know that the connection goes beyond what the eye can see… yet being around Gurudev is such an amazing experience. There is such lightness of being, such complete happiness and clarity. It is indescribable and I cannot articulate it.
May 8, 2006 — 12:43 pm
minn says:
*hugs*
Focus on his aura and his words when it gets difficult.
May 8, 2006 — 12:45 pm
Lakshmi says:
He says it Himself, love and longing are inseparable. Thankfully, even when I am away from Him, the connection stays…:-)
May 8, 2006 — 12:56 pm
Anonymous says:
How sad ! You are so much attached to somebody who professes detachment with everything.
May 9, 2006 — 6:33 am
Lakshmi says:
🙂 I don’t feel sad about that. He is my Guru and hence I feel this adoration for him.
May 9, 2006 — 9:55 am
fugney says:
Punched in my password this morning on my laptop at work, promptly burst into tears, blew my nose and sniffled into my large, blue handkerchief and was quite fine after that.
😀 I’m sorry, I just found that funny:)
May 9, 2006 — 9:51 am
Lakshmi says:
🙂 Was meant to be funny!
May 9, 2006 — 9:54 am
iyer_the_gr8 says:
How???
How did you miss the opportunity to see him off at the airport?
May 9, 2006 — 2:18 pm
Lakshmi says:
Re: How???
B’cos we couldn’t reach San Antonio in time after dropping K off.
May 9, 2006 — 2:27 pm