SIMPLY BEING

Tag: ego (page 1 of 1)

Habits

It’s an interesting phenomenon when a habit dissolves, and there is not another one to take its place. For instance, dinner used to be a habit, and now it’s poof… gone! A wide expanse of time has opened up in the evenings. No dinner, no cleanup… all this time, what is a person to do?

I love this quote by novelist Susan Ertz. “Millions long for immortality who don’t know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.”

“I can’t function without my morning chai,” “I cannot end a meal without yogurt and rice,” “I cannot wear leather,” and so on. All habits, I think? And as I realized during recent travels, yes, I can function without morning chai, and yes, I just bought a leather purse!

I wonder if we define ourselves by these habits, and when they dissolve, we think we are dissolving, too. And prolly that’s why we hasten to find new ones. (Or perhaps, we are frightened of empty space and time.)

(I, for one, have a hard time developing new habits. No sooner do I make a resolution than I am plotting to break free of it!)

Video: Hair Saga

Hair!

It’s more on our minds than on our heads.

Hair plays an important role in our lives. It is an indicator of health, alright… But it is also an aspect of identity and personality, and so much else.

As a child and young adult, I was hair-obsessed. I thought that having a good head of hair was ALL you needed for eternal happiness. No, I am not kidding. And much this had to do with social conditioning.

Thankfully, I am a wee bit wiser now as far as hair matters are concerned.

Video: Ego and All that Stuff

You hear so much about how the ego isn’t such a good thing, and that it needs to be “destroyed,” and so on. Well, the ego is an inseparable part of human life, and trying to destroy it is a wasted effort. On the contrary, we can gain a lot from cultivating a healthy ego.

Invisible

These days, it seems like I am tending to borderline invisibility.

My boundary (L-A-K-S-H-M-I) seems to be wearing thin. If I don’t hold myself together, I feel like pieces of me may float right out into the ether. This isn’t about incoherence or feeling spacey. It is a disconnect from the public facing identity that, in my case, is always on the point of breaking away. It is a veneer that is dangerously see-through. Sometimes, it is misleading/ambiguous (not intentionally).

There are the people with strong, healthy, defined egos. They are independent, seeking no validation whatsoever. Then there are the unhealthy ones that feed off others for survival, like vampires. Then there are the in-betweens, like me. It is a thin veil, and there is little motivation to keep it intact. There is little attachment between the inner layer and the outer apparel, so it feels effortless to ditch the outerwear and float off.